I just realized it wasn’t my fear of failure that held me back my whole life.

It was my fear of judgment.

Turns out, this distinction really matters.

Maybe you’re someone that feels like they have more to offer the world.

Or you’re a leader trying to build a culture of innovation.

It’s the same fear underneath it all.

I was in a Christmas play in grade 5.

I wasn’t the lead, I was the understudy – the person that gets the call if the lead gets sick or hurt.

The day before our big show, the lead broke his leg playing hockey.

It was my time to shine!

And I choked.

I forgot my lines, and I remember my costar Tracy whispering my lines to me.

I also had a major crush on her – that didn’t help.

I got through it, and tried to tell myself nobody noticed.

But afterwards, I overheard the rest of the cast talking about how I ruined the show for everyone.

I was devastated.

Before that play, I wasn’t afraid of taking chances.

After all, I was the one who put their hand up to be the understudy.

But after that, I didn’t raise my hand once.

In 40 years.

Which begs the question…

Was it really the fear of failure that held me back?

Or the fear of judgment?

If my classmates had been supportive instead of cruel, I’m not writing this post 40 years later.

It wasn’t forgetting my lines that stuck with me.

It was those whispers, “Bob ruined it for everyone.”

I share this story all the time with leaders who tell me they want to build a culture of innovation.

A culture where people are not afraid to innovate, to try new things, to fail.

Everyone has a story like mine.

People are so sensitive to this fear of judgment.

It’s what holds many of us back.

They might even sense judgment where it doesn’t exist.

And if they sense even a hint of it, it will derail your efforts to create the culture you’re aiming for.

So maybe it’s not a culture free of failure you’re trying to create.

It’s a culture free of judgment.

It just might be the nuance that makes all the difference.

P.S. Tracy Ryan went on to become a well known actress in her own right. She’s not on LinkedIn, which is probably just as well.